Why It’s Important to Use People’s Correct Pronouns
Everybody uses pronouns. While some people would have you believe that the only correct pronouns are “he” or “she,” the singular “they” has been used in the English language for over 600 years! Even neopronouns have been recorded as far back as 1789. Using people’s correct pronouns is an important and simple way to show respect for the people around you.
On October 16th, we celebrated International Pronouns Day, making this a great time to remind folks about the importance of proper pronoun use and educate them as to why it’s important to respect the pronouns that people select for themselves. Using someone’s correct pronouns shows them that their feelings matter and that you recognize their right to determine their own identity, regardless of what you think it should be. It’s about treating others with basic human dignity and respect.
I believe that we have an obligation to do our best to respect other people’s pronouns, even when it’s hard or feels awkward. If you have struggled to use correct pronouns, here are some helpful tools to practice:
Put people’s pronouns next to their name in your phone and email contact list.
If you are on a video call, write their pronouns on a Post-it note and stick it on your screen.
Always practice using someone’s correct pronouns, even when they aren’t around, and you’re talking about them with someone else.
If you struggle to use correct pronouns because you experience emotional pain or embarrassment when you make a mistake or are corrected by someone else, I want you to remember that the problem isn’t that you have been asked to do something that is too difficult or hard for you.
Humans make mistakes. We are imperfect, but that does not mean that we shouldn’t continue to try. We should all foster the ability to respond to those mistakes and correct ourselves with good humor and thankfulness for the chance to try again.
So please, never give up. When we use people’s correct pronouns, we show folks that they and their identity matter to us. We have the power to make the world a kinder, better place. Your words and actions matter.